Squirrels to Humanity: Nuts to You!

crataegus> Dave, all squirrels are cannibals.
FuzzyDave> !!!
crataegus> I'm not just sayin that because I loathe squirrels.
crataegus> They'll eat another squirrels young, baby birds, etc. Squirrels eat anything.
FuzzyDave> i thought their diet was mostly acorns and snakki treats. i didn't know they ate meats
crataegus> I've even seen them picking at road jerky before.
FuzzyDave> my god. the Squirrel Apocalypse is already beginning.
FuzzyDave> civilization is well and truly fscked now
crataegus> Now you know why I want to kill them all with fire.
FuzzyDave> is fire the only way to kill them? what about Big Shoes? or Strategically Placed Anvils?
crataegus> Anvils might work. Big Shoes, no. They'll chew their way through.
crataegus>Cars, birds of prey, and fire...those are the sure ways.
FuzzyDave> i KNEW i shoulda never given up falconry!
crataegus> Oh, and nuking them from space, of course.
FuzzyDave> i KNEW i shoulda never thrown away that Testors Thermonuclear ICBM model rocket kit!